I woke up early this morning. I woke up early, set up my essential oil difffuser with some lemon and peppermint, and started making my list of things the kids and I needed to get done today. School starts next Tuesday and we have some back to school shopping to do.
Then I got a call from my husband.
He told me that he has to go back to Florida on Wednesday for a week…maybe two.
I lost it. I literally broke down and had a full blown out anxiety attack. He just got home from Florida. He was JUST there for two weeks and it was the longest two weeks of my life. The only thing that got me through those two weeks was knowing I wouldn’t have to do that again. Yet here I am, getting ready for him to leave again for who knows how long.
He’s never missed a first day of school for the kids. He has always been there with me every year. The kids are going to be heartbroken but they are also the most understanding kids I have ever met. Last time, James said, “We have to be supportive of Dad.” and he is right. Those words are ringing in my head right now.
What is making me laugh between the tears is that I am a very independent person. I honestly don’t mind doing things on my own, it’s actually quite calming at times, but that doesn’t mean I WANT to. And I don’t want to go another week or two without my husband — he’s my best friend.
I actually have a lot that I need to get done today — I’ve spent enough time this morning crying over something I cannot change. I have to make a few calls to family and friends since our plans for this holiday weekend went from the four of us, to the two of us and now to just me.
I’m not usually the Negative Nancy when I blog, but today is a little different. Today I’m sad — but tomorrow will be a new day.