Let’s Talk About Sibling Arguments

Nothing like a jog down memory lane to trigger some memories. I was talking with my mom yesterday about how the kids were bickering in the car the other day the whole way home from their mom’s house. “Well why didn’t you tell them to stop arguing?” she asked me. That is a great question mom, let me explain to you why I don’t interrupt their arguing every time.

When they were probably three and four, James and Jordan use to fight every. single. day. No joke, they would find SOMETHING to be pissed off about and just pick at each other until one of them whacks the other one. I would have to follow them around and break up arguments for what felt like, the entire day. I’m serious, by 7 o’clock at night I am literally melted into the couch from having flames shooting out of my ears with anger all day. My husband wasn’t too thrilled on their attitudes either and he would just lose his cool after the third time we would hear, “Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaammmessss!” It was exhausting having to do that and I got to a point where I said, ENOUGH!

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These aren’t my kids, but boy have I seen this scenario played out before in my house!

I began to let them fight it out. Not physically, but verbally. They needed to learn how to solve problems without one of us adults being there to break it up and explain what they are doing wrong every time. At first, they would look at me as they were arguing. Then they would get a little louder, pause and look at me as if they were waiting for me to tell them to cut it out,  but I didn’t. Was it nerve racking at first? Oh you bet it was, but it worked! They began figuring out ways to solve their problems all on their own! Some times it takes a few minutes, but the negotiating with each other will eventually kick in and they find a solution without having to decapitate each other.

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My husband didn’t like this idea at first, but I asked him, “Aren’t you exhausted breaking up their petty fights all the time? Because I sure am!” and I would explain how this is helping their future social skills. If you ask either one of the kids now, “How do we solve problems at our house?” they will (hopefully) answer with, “We communicate with each other.” — That is something we have always said since day one with them, in hopes that it will be embedded in their brains for eternity.

They will always argue, I know that. I have two younger brothers who STILL get under my skin and they are 26 and 24 with hundreds of miles in between us, but the munchkins needed to learn a hard lesson of figuring out their own problems with each other. Those are kid problems that should be solved by kids, at least that’s my view on that. What do you think?

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Feel Good Friday: (8/19)

Vacation on an island

Friday is dedicated to five things that made me feel good this week! I think this is a fabulous way to look back on my week and even on the bad days, try to find the good! What made you feel good this week?

*ONE* ::: Matt is still in Florida and this past Sunday the kids and I went to my Dad and stepmom’s house for dinner. We had Greek food for dinner and the kids ate it all up. I was so surprised that James likes tabouli and tzatziki sauce and he even had seconds. I love watching their taste buds change through out the years. It sure helps with expanding my recipe book!

*TWO* :::  It was Stephanie’s birthday on Wednesday and the kids made her special cards at the house and Wednesday morning they called her and sang Happy Birthday. It was really adorable. It fills my heart with joy being able to do little things like that for her on her birthday or holidays. I appreciate when she does things like that for me and I love being able to return the kindness.

*THREE* ::: Tomorrow my husband comes home. THAT is something that has made me feel good all week, knowing that he will be home soon and our lives can go back to being some what normal. I am an independent person and I can survive fine without anyone else, but that doesn’t mean I want to. I miss him so much, I even miss him being a pain in my ass.

*FOUR* ::: Marilyn (my awesome/amazing step mom) took the kids to see Pete’s Dragon this week. The kids were so excited and this was quite the special treat for them. My dad and I went to the restaurant next door and had a couple cocktails as we waited for the movie to get out. I love being able to spend some one on one time with my dad. He’s a pretty awesome guy and I love the conversations we’ve been able to have now that I am a parent too.

*FIVE* ::: I’m back in Indiana helping my Grandma out (she’s doing a lot better than she was last week! Yay, Mamaw!) and I believe that spending time with family is always good for the soul. While I am here I am able to help out with stuff around the house and cook everyone some delicious home cooked meals. I’m thankful I have been able to be here for my family in there time of need. I think it has helped bond all of us.

Reblog: Money

I usually share my favorite posts on Tuesday and I already have one from this mama all set up for this coming up week, but I read this post and I just had to share it. This post right here is real and honest. I feel you on this one, mama!

Momma on the Edge

imageBrace yourselves lovelies…Momma is about to get all philosophical on your ass!

I was woken up by my husband at o’dark thirty this morning because he can’t seem to get ready for work without sounding like he’s building a house. #wifeproblems

Half asleep I came downstairs, mixed up my magic coffee potion and came out to my porch to assume my normal morning position. It was pitch black out because much to my dismay, I was up before the sun.

Being groggy and drinking my delicious coffee got me thinking about life and how twisted it is. How the average American works their ass off and barely scrapes by. How our lives our controlled by the almighty dollar. Sure we love our family and friends and what have you. But we are all hamsters on a wheel, chasing money to pay for material bullshit.

Do I know how to…

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