Learn. Something I have been doing for years, but more specific, learning how to be a great step mom and wife.
The second my step kids walked into my life, everything changed. I was now apart of a team to help raise a 18 month old and a 2 year old. I had to learn to change diapers. I had to learn to put my foot down and say no to the kids. I had to learn that I had to EARN respect from the kids and Matt’s ex wife, it wasn’t just going to happen over night. I had to learn how to take care of spiral curly hair, because Jordan has A LOT of it. I had to learn how to fix imaginary boo-boo’s with a glitter pink wand. I had to learn how to play little kid games and use my imagination. I had to learn how to teach a kid how to blow their nose and tie their shoes. I had to learn how to co-parent with a woman I knew hated my guts. I had to learn to take the high road, and that really killed my pride at first. I learned that taking the high road didn’t make me weak, it made me stronger. I was able to learn how to co-parent without lashing out.
I had to re-learn how to basically live my life. I had to learn how to be a parent in a short amount of time and play catch up on the things I missed along the way. Learning all of these things all at once was very overwhelming. I had ONE shot to get this right. I couldn’t let my future husband down and I couldn’t let James and Jordan down. I spent months reading book after book about co-parenting, blended families and step parenting. I wanted to have all the tools at my finger tips because my family deserved the best. Just because I didn’t KNOW how to do all of these things didn’t mean I couldn’t LEARN them. I’m a very smart woman and I knew if I wanted to learn this, I would.
I know I’m not perfect and I make mistakes, but I learn from them. I knew I was going to step on toes, not on purpose, but I was learning. I was going to cry a lot of nights, but I was learning on how to handle this new lifestyle. The step mom lifestyle of all the work and no reward. I learned that the reward is in the love I receive, in the smiles on the kid’s faces when I pick them up from school and in the way Matt looks at me every morning when we wake up. Out of everything I have learned, I learned that THIS is exactly where I want to be in my life. Happy and in love with my amazing little family, taking everything one day at a time and realizing that we are ALL still learning, and that’s okay.