I am happy to spend this crazy thing we call life with my incredible husband. We are a united front and can conquer anything the universe throws our way. It might be hard and it might get overwhelming, but together we will get through it. We have been through some very difficult times and only came out stronger, because we worked at it. We didn’t give up.
My husband (let’s call him M for the sake of confusion) and I have been in a relationship for almost six years and I love that man more and more every day. I’m not a sappy love person, I don’t do PDA and I cannot stand hearing people use cliche sayings when describing being in love. Well here I am, being a total hypocrite because I believe in the cliche sayings now. Every time I see M’s face my heart still skips a beat. In a crowded room we can lock eyes from opposite sides of the room and everyone else just disappears. I know, I know, it sounds all mushy and too good to be true, but if this is what true love feels like, I am one lucky woman.
M always has my back. He is my biggest support and best friend. He knows what I’m thinking before I can even open my mouth. That really helps when it comes to parenting. The munchkins know how much their daddy and I love and respect each other. We don’t have any secrets and everything is always laid out on the table. There are times when the kids get in trouble when their dad is at work and they already know I’m going to tell him about what happened. It doesn’t mean they will get in double trouble, but he will be made aware of the situation. There should be no secrets in a marriage and we want them to see that.
When co-parenting you must remember two things. First, support and back your spouse. Second, respect the mother/father of your children. I understand you can’t make everyone happy and that’s not what I’m saying, but you have to keep both of those points in mind when handling co-parenting obstacles. You must stand united with your spouse, but you have to show your kids that you respect their other parent. It will benefit them in the long run, trust me.
There was a time when I was at Little Man’s sporting event and they were passing out a team sheet. M was an Assistant Coach on the team and was out on the field, so he couldn’t grab the paper. I walked over to the lady who was handing them out, introduced myself and asked for one of the papers. She looked at me and said “I already gave one to his MOTHER, I don’t want to get in the middle of anything so go ask her for the paper.” I sat there humiliated in front of all the parents. I didn’t know exactly what to say to her because I have never had anyone speak to me like that before and be so assuming as to my husband’s ex and I are fighting. We might not be best friends or agree on a lot of things, but we would never disrespect each other like THAT, especially in public. The ex had already left after she got the paper so I wasn’t able to talk to her about it right then. When M and I got in the car to leave the practice, (the munchkins were with their mom) I sobbed my eyes out. He asked me what happened and I explained the whole story. He was enraged. I have never seen him get so upset. M sure had my back though. He talked to the mom who insulted me, I don’t remember exactly what he said, but he stood up for me and things changed. We were a united front through out the entire situation and it made us even stronger.
We are going to come across many more obstacles through out our marriage. If we didn’t, then I would say we didn’t have a healthy marriage. As long as we stand united together, I believe love does conquer all.
Here is the letter I wrote my husband awhile back.