M is for Mother’s Day

M

Let’s talk about how M is for Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day in the United States is in about three weeks, and I’m a childless stepmama. When I was working on my alphabet, the munchkins actually helped me with some of the letters. It was really cute. The first letter Little Miss pointed to was “M”, she told me I should do Mom, “because, well, you pretty much are one.” Little man concurred and added, “You should do Mother’s Day. It’s in a couple months and you love Mother’s Day.” All true statements and I will tell you why.

I have never expected anything from the munchkins on Mother’s Day. That is not something I would ever dream of taking away from their mother. They always make her handmade cards. It’s from the heart and personal. They are not aloud to rush through it and they really put their all into it. I know she appreciates them.

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Mother’s Day falls on a Sunday every year, and every Sunday the kids are with their mom for half the day and the other half they are with us until the following Wednesday. She has never once asked to keep them all day. She has always kept it the same. One year at the beginning, the munchkins came home with homemade crafts they made for me! I was shocked and very emotional. I really wasn’t expecting that, and it hadn’t even crossed my mind that they would do it. Their mother then told me that there was a card in one of the munchkins bags for me too. She wished me a Happy Mother’s Day, said good bye and left. I stood at the closed door with my jaw dropped to the floor. Yes, this is coming from the same woman you have read about in my posts before. I opened the card. It was a bright and colorful Mother’s Day card, addressed to me with “signatures” from the munchkins. Next thing you know, I am bawling my eyes out, like full blown joyful tears.

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She didn’t have to do that. She didn’t have to do any of that, but she did, and it was a huge breakthrough.

She doesn’t have to split Mother’s Day with me, but she does. She doesn’t have to buy me or have the munchkins make me, a Mother’s Day card every year, but she does. She doesn’t have to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day early in the morning every year, without fail, but she does. And I am forever grateful to her for that. She could of made this day a living hell for me, and she didn’t. She truly does understand what I do for her children, and I truly believe she is grateful for me (whether she admits it or not).

This may not sound like much to everyone, but to stepmothers, it means the world. Mother’s Day can be a very difficult day for stepmamas. You might feel like you are forgotten, that what you do isn’t appreciated, and you are being taken for granted. They say there is a “Stepmother’s Day” but come on, I feel like only stepmoms are the ones that even know when that day is. Mother’s Day should be celebrated with ALL Mother’s. Biological mothers, adoptive mothers, foster mothers, stepmothers, grandmothers, aunts, cousins, and any mother figure in your life.

If you are a bio mom, and you have a stepmother in your kid’s lives, do something nice for them on Mother’s Day. It doesn’t have to be big, even just a simple “Happy Mother’s Day.” and watch how one little statement, changes an entire situation.

I know it’s early but Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mama’s out there. A special shout out to my stepmama’s. This life we chose isn’t easy, but take a step back and look at the woman you have become because of that. Here’s to you!

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30 thoughts on “M is for Mother’s Day

  1. I wouldn’t call you childless. They might not be yours through birth, but you’ve been there- they are yours. My sister is also a step mom to two, and even before she had their first together (second due around mother’s day, go figure, lol) we all still acknowledged her rule of mom.
    If one adopts, they are a parent. Same goes for the woman (or man) who marries an individual with kids. They become a parent. And they should be recognized as such.
    I am so happy to hear she allows you to be involved on Mother’s day. Not all mothers would do that. She clearly recognizes your importance in the munchkins lives. She isn’t perfect, but it takes a big person to put the kid first…So many don’t, and use the kids as weapons.
    Happy early Mother’s day! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This was a beautiful post. I’m so happy that the mother of your stepchildren is so gracious to you and vice versa. I think you set the tone, and that makes you a very special stepmom. From experience, this is not easy. Kudos to you! and…Happy Mother’s Day!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I definitely am a stepmom that isn’t able to have Mother’s Day…. At least in the past, who knows maybe your post will get around to her and she’ll say something nice to me… We’ll see. Even though I think it’s silly to have a separate day for step moms because at least I’ll get something. Maybe in the future…. We won’t need to use it…. I hope.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I mean when people say that there is a Stepmother’s Day, I usually just give them a blank stare. Like, thank you for acknowledging I’m not worthy enough to share the day with every single other mother in the world. I’m sorry about your Mother’s Days from the past, but that’s exactly what they are, the past. Your step daughter knows who is there for her non stop. She knows who is number 1 in her daddy’s and stepmama’s heart, and she is one lucky girl ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I think its great that she does. I’m kinda surprised. But then again she probably knows you’re doing your best with her kids and the love they have for you is very apparent, because it stems from the pure love that you have for them. And she knows it.
    I’m not sure if I’d do the same if my kids end up having a step mom though. I’d probably just gloat that Ha! It’s MY day LOL. No offense intended to you or any of the step parents. But the anger I have towards their dad now makes me think that way. Hopefully it won’t last forever 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • You aren’t the only one surprised! After everything this woman puts me through, she makes sure I’m acknowledged on Mother’s Day.
      I had a sneaky feeling you wouldn’t want to do the same thing, but every situation is different! No offense taken, but any woman that goes around your ex needs to be warned about who he is. He’s a liability. LOL

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is a very touching & beautiful post. With your permission, I’d very much like to add a link to your post to a Mother’s Day feature we’ll be launching this weekend on my husband’s blog, Marriage-Reset. Please let us know – I think a lot of stepmoms will be very touched by the thoughts and feelings you’ve shared.

    Liked by 1 person

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