Let’s talk about how M is for Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day in the United States is in about three weeks, and I’m a childless stepmama. When I was working on my alphabet, the munchkins actually helped me with some of the letters. It was really cute. The first letter Little Miss pointed to was “M”, she told me I should do Mom, “because, well, you pretty much are one.” Little man concurred and added, “You should do Mother’s Day. It’s in a couple months and you love Mother’s Day.” All true statements and I will tell you why.
I have never expected anything from the munchkins on Mother’s Day. That is not something I would ever dream of taking away from their mother. They always make her handmade cards. It’s from the heart and personal. They are not aloud to rush through it and they really put their all into it. I know she appreciates them.
Mother’s Day falls on a Sunday every year, and every Sunday the kids are with their mom for half the day and the other half they are with us until the following Wednesday. She has never once asked to keep them all day. She has always kept it the same. One year at the beginning, the munchkins came home with homemade crafts they made for me! I was shocked and very emotional. I really wasn’t expecting that, and it hadn’t even crossed my mind that they would do it. Their mother then told me that there was a card in one of the munchkins bags for me too. She wished me a Happy Mother’s Day, said good bye and left. I stood at the closed door with my jaw dropped to the floor. Yes, this is coming from the same woman you have read about in my posts before. I opened the card. It was a bright and colorful Mother’s Day card, addressed to me with “signatures” from the munchkins. Next thing you know, I am bawling my eyes out, like full blown joyful tears.
She didn’t have to do that. She didn’t have to do any of that, but she did, and it was a huge breakthrough.
She doesn’t have to split Mother’s Day with me, but she does. She doesn’t have to buy me or have the munchkins make me, a Mother’s Day card every year, but she does. She doesn’t have to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day early in the morning every year, without fail, but she does. And I am forever grateful to her for that. She could of made this day a living hell for me, and she didn’t. She truly does understand what I do for her children, and I truly believe she is grateful for me (whether she admits it or not).
This may not sound like much to everyone, but to stepmothers, it means the world. Mother’s Day can be a very difficult day for stepmamas. You might feel like you are forgotten, that what you do isn’t appreciated, and you are being taken for granted. They say there is a “Stepmother’s Day” but come on, I feel like only stepmoms are the ones that even know when that day is. Mother’s Day should be celebrated with ALL Mother’s. Biological mothers, adoptive mothers, foster mothers, stepmothers, grandmothers, aunts, cousins, and any mother figure in your life.
If you are a bio mom, and you have a stepmother in your kid’s lives, do something nice for them on Mother’s Day. It doesn’t have to be big, even just a simple “Happy Mother’s Day.” and watch how one little statement, changes an entire situation.
I know it’s early but Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mama’s out there. A special shout out to my stepmama’s. This life we chose isn’t easy, but take a step back and look at the woman you have become because of that. Here’s to you!